Why doesn’t he show himself to me as a big light or a booming voice?
I have known many people who have struggled with wanting to believe that God is real, but fail to experience seeing or hearing Him. These people ultimately come to one of two conclusions: God musn't be real. Or God doesn't care about me. Both of these thoughts ultimately end in the person choosing to walk away from pursuing Christianity, resuming their lives as they are currently living it.
But what if that perspective is wrong?
I'm here to talk to you about this common speedbump in people's journey to knowing God, and shed some light on it .
People want proof that God is real before deciding whether or not to follow Him. This isn't a bad thing necessarily, it's in our nature to want to make sure that things are true before we give ourselves over to them, and indeed that is a safe way to live our lives.
There are times in the Bible that God spoke in a loud voice or performed a miracle in front of someone. These were commonly in the Old Testament, where the knowledge of God was not widely spread. God's Holy Spirit would come upon certain people for certain times, allowing them to hear and receive from God, but these were select people and not everyone had this privledge. The only way to regularly access God for most people was by going to the Temple and having the priests pray on your behalf. Confirmation that God existed for these people greatly depended on the miracles He performed among them.
These were times before the knowledge of God was widely spread. God was still referred to as 'Jacob's God' or "Israel's God" as this was the founding father of the Israelite community who were the first people to follow God. But God is no longer a foreign name or concept to people, and everyone today has heard of God and Jesus. The goal has shifted from showing people He exists, to having relationship with them.
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Expecting a booming light or a loud voice takes away the trust and faith that is such a key part of relationship with God. If we need an external manifestation of God to prove Himself to us that He is real, how will we be able to trust that He is there at other points in our journey? Learning how to trust God's character and nature in spite of our doubts is what builds our character, resilience, and faith.
We expect that the only way He works is by through the flashy shows and bright lights. But a God that only operates that way would be inconsistent, only showing up in certain times. God is bigger and larger than the world around us, which also means that He can be within the world all the time. He is with us always, which means that He makes himself known in a way that we can always interpret and have access to - Holy Spirit.
Through Holy Spirit we now all have access to hearing and feeling connected to God if we so wish. We no longer depend on external miracles or Priests to help build our connection to God, we can go directly to the source. The miracle of Holy Spirit, made accessible only through Jesus' death, means that God can now access and live among us 24/7. He can use Holy Spirit to open your eyes and heart to see Him in the seemingly normal. God proves His existence in the every day life we live. The evidence of God's existence lies all around us, if we are so willing to see it.
"For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse." Romans 1:20
We are sitting here waiting for a big loud voice, but there is evidence of God's love all around us. The small things that are more than coincidence. The kind things others do to us. The small nudges and gut feelings we get in our everyday. It's all signs of God talking to us and guiding us in our every day.
In fact, the very fact that all humans have a moral compass, guiding their behaviours, and an innate need to love and be loved proves on a scientific level that we are all wired from one mould - the image of God.
"Indeed, when Gentiles, who do not have the law, do by nature what the law requires, they are a law to themselves, even though they do not have the law. So they show that the work of the law is written on their hearts, their consciences also bearing witness, and their thoughts either accusing or defending them" Romans 2:14-15
If you are in the position where you are wanting to hear from God, desperately wnating to know if He is actually real, take a chance. Take a leap of faith, and start to explore by going to church, reading the Bible and talking to Christian friends. The only way you'll know for sure is by seeking Him out yourself.
And I promise that if you come with humility, open eyes, and a heart that is ready to trust and have faith, then God will reveal Himself to you and touch your life. He did it with me, and He can do it with you.
God Bless.